McMaster vs BuckMaster

I wonder why no news media outlets used such an inviting, rhyming title for their articles about Craigslist's CEO Jim Buckmaster vs South Carolina's AG McMaster.

In fact, the only reason I'm even commenting on this issue is because I wanted to use this headline. :)
I really have no opinions on this other than that the funny observation on how South Carolina's McMaster is declaring 'victory' like the iraqis did after losing to the US in 2003.



They say he's priming for the governor race. Clearly, he has the most important characteristic - having demonstrated a distinct lack of character.

Garnier And 'Take Care'

What's with Garnier Fructis ads ending in 'take care' ? 

Anybody know? 

Take for example this hair fall fighting shampoo ad. 

It ends with this beautiful girl walking towards you .. and you're thinking

 'oh here she comes..'

 'she is coming here .. '   

*turn and look behind you* 

 'she is coming to ME ..! '  

'Uh Oh..' 

She stands in front of you and raises her chin.. and you're heart and brain( if it can be called that)  are racing ..

 

'is she going to kiss me ?.. ' 

'do I kiss back ..? ' 

 'should I kiss first?..'  

' is my mouth fresh ? ' 

 'WHERE'S THE DAMN GUM?!' .. 

and she says 'Take care' in a sultry sexy voice. 

Now tell me ..what the hell does that mean ? 

Maybe I'm a stupid optimist.. but it gets me everytime. These garnier people are a mean bunch... but hey, what has  shampoo got to do with a girl that almost kisses you? 

 

New training for journalists and politicians

In the light of the shoe throwing incident with Mr. Chidambaram - our venerable home minister who just pronounced Mr. Tytler even more venerable than him - both the govt. and journalism schools seem to have learnt some important lessons. And they are graciously ready to impart this wisdom to the deserving. 

The Paduka school of Journalism today announced an additional course titled 'Effective Shoe Throwing' . 

Mr. B Aata, the Dean of the school said 

"Contrary to popular belief, neither pounding on the keyboard nor writing pages of rubbish contribute to developing your arm muscles. Hence, journalists' throwing skills are typically pretty poor. "

"However, it still doesn't excuse both famous shoe throwing incidents missing the targets entirely.  In the Iraqi case, the credit probably goes to the physical fitness of Mr. George 'cowboy' Bush. Nevertheless, we journalists have become a laughing stock of the world. 

It is a proud day for Indians. Our course is the first of its kind in the world. We are already getting queries from students all over the world especially, the middle east. "

About the course, he said 

"We will have course material on wind dynamics on shoe projectiles. Students will be able to compare and contrast the projectiles of Nikes vs Reeboks vs Cheap chinese makes. They also will be able to predict the projectiles of other desi jhoothas.  

We not only prepare the students in throwing shoes, but we also prepare them to be mentally prepared and not get nervous before the act. 

Focussing equally on practise as on theory, we will invite several eminent 'Guest lecturers' from the political establishment to *wink wink* 'lecture' to our students. "

Mr. Chidambaram's office has not yet returned our calls. They have instead sent us an 'I forgive you'  letter "

He also added 

"For a very nominal fee, we also offer to train the mothers of students in writing the most effective thank you letters. "

Not to be outdone, the Defense Ministry has sent a circular.  They have announced a new chapter to their 'How to not get killed by terrorists or honest citizens' training course they impart to politicians. The chapter - the military influence is obvious here- is titled "Avoiding non-lethal sub-sonic projectiles" . 

Speaking to the press, Mr. J Chaat Urvedi, the director of R&AW said  

"The course is free for all politicians - not just those part of government. To enroll, you just need to have the following prerequisites. 

* Be a public figure that has stalled traffic in atleast 1 major city while bussing audiences to your rally. 

* Have atleast 1 allegation of bribery, nepotism with money amounting to atleast Rs. 50 crore

* Have atleast 1 pending case in the court against you. You will receive priority if the case is criminal in nature. Murder or rape gets even higher priority. " 

He also added  

"This is a fine example of inter-departmental cooperation. The course uses bending and evading tactics that we teach bobcat commandoes. These highly trained personnel are used by our bureaucrats & politicians for household chores & sometimes security. Angry babus and their expensive Italian shoes have caused some personnel downtime in the past" 

To the titter of the press present at the event, he added 

"The course has been customized for politicians who have larger bellies and posteriors, but still need to be agile in these situations"   

Ending the conference he lamented

"It is sad that such eminent and honorable politicians are on the receiving end of shoes, especially the cheap desi/chinese makes worn by these penniless journalists. I did not think I would live to see this day". He was speaking from his 'safe house' apartment in Noida.

 

- Reporting from Bangalore by Very Pagal Patrakar inspired by faking news

Sydney & Canberra

Sydney & Canberra

(Episode 4 of our Ozzie trip) 
The famed Bondi beach at Sydney is very clean. Since we got there at noon, it wasn't exactly fun to prance around the sand. 

The sights around Sydney were good.. the tower from which we got to see the entire city landscape is a must visit. 

The opera house is also another must. 

Canberra

was mildly interesting.. the parliament house was good, and the visit there included an introduction to Australian govt., and how they're organized. The war memorial, and the embassies of various countries are interesting to look at. 

Cairns

(Episode 3 of our Ozzie trip) Cairns is where the great barrier reef is. We did a submersible trip, spent a lot of time getting burnt snorkelling, saw a bunch of salties ( Australian monster crocs ) and huge turtles. The coral reefs are out of the world. I thought I'd seen enough in Lakshadweep, but this was something else. Fishes, huge starfish, all kinds of whacked looking corals are out there.	From Australia-Sep-2008
We also visited the Kuranda rain forest. The forest is so thick you traverse it from the top using a cable car. A very memorable ride. The native aboriginals called the Tjapugais put up a show for us. It was pretty interesting listening to their songs, see them make fire, blow the didgeridoo..etc.	From Australia-Sep-2008
They also had a boomerang throwing session - but they cheated us there. It was supposed to be 3 tries a person, but seeing our group size, they cut it down to one throw a person. It was ridiculous, but it was still interesting to see them throw the boomerang.  Next: Sydney & Canberra

Brisbane/ Gold coast

Brisbane / GoldCoast (Episode 2 of our Ozzie trip)  This is the equivalent of the LA / Vegas circuit in the US. Lots of beaches, amusement parks, water activity.. generally lots of entertainment stuff. We visited the amusement parks mainly.. Movie world and Seaworld. If you've been to the ones in the US.. there's not much you'll gain here. But the kids will have fun for sure.  Next: Cairns (The great barrier reef)

From Australia-Sep-2008

Melbourne / apostles / penguins

Melbourne (The initial days of our Ozzie trip)  Melbourne city was nice, but probably remarkable only to those who've never seen a city in a developed country. Day 1 : Only time to visit the crown casino after dinner. Its the biggest casino in Australia, but its just filled with slot machines/gambling tables with no sense of beauty. Surely don't expect Las Vegas when you enter here. Though they don't allow kids into the casino, there's a different kids area with lots of video games and other activities in the building. Your guide may not know about it.. but just ask the guys at the door. Day 2 : Melbourne Cricket Ground (MCG) was the highlight of the day apart from the city tour. The city tour was lame, but MCG was something else. Did you know that they use a mix of two kinds of grass on the ground ? Cooch & Rye, the guide said. One is better for summer, and the other for winter.  Phillip island was awesome. You wait for a while, everybody gets a little restless with the nippy air... and then you see the penguins. Just the sight of those things changes the entire atmosphere. :) They keep trying to build up the courage to cross the beach into the hills. They come on to the beach, waddle a few steps, and then go back into the water with the next wave. They also swim to different points in the beach picking the right point. You'd think they're at Dunkirk. As more join the group, their courage grows. Finally they waddle across in a big hurry. They probably think they're doing the 100m sprint, but you get plenty of time to watch them. Next, they climb the hill slowly in a line. Often in pairs/twosomes or more. Then you have the bunch of them yelling at each other, claiming territory and generally being very busy. :) Too bad we couldn't take some pictures and scare them with our camera flashes. :)	Painted glass in St. Patricks Cathedral :From Australia-Sep-2008 Melbourne war memorial: From Australia-Sep-2008
Day 3: This was a long & well worth drive to see the 12 Apostles ( 8.5, really ). The helicopter ride is a must. On our own, we'd probably have skimped on the helicopter ride seeing the 100+ dollars/ person tag; glad it was already paid for. Next: Brisbane/Gold coast	From Australia-Sep-2008